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GCSE English Language · Edexcel style · Paper 2 Section A, Question 3 style
Edexcel Paper 2, Question 3 style: language and structure in American Notes (American Notes)
AO215 marks · about 20 minutes

Analyse how the writer uses language and structure to interest and engage the reader. Support your views with detailed reference to the text. [15 marks]

Read the extract, then write below it.
My stay in Philadelphia was very short, but what I saw of its society, I greatly liked. Treating of its general characteristics, I should be disposed to say that it is more provincial than Boston or New York, and that there is afloat in the fair city, an assumption of taste and criticism, savouring rather of those genteel discussions upon the same themes, in connection with Shakspeare and the Musical Glasses, of which we read in the Vicar of Wakefield. Near the city, is a most splendid unfinished marble structure for the Girard College, founded by a deceased gentleman of that name and of enormous wealth, which, if completed according to the original design, will be perhaps the richest edifice of modern times. But the bequest is involved in legal disputes, and pending them the work has stopped; so that like many other great undertakings in America, even this is rather going to be done one of these days, than doing now. In the outskirts, stands a great prison, called the Eastern Penitentiary: conducted on a plan peculiar to the state of Pennsylvania. The system here, is rigid, strict, and hopeless solitary confinement. I believe it, in its effects, to be cruel and wrong. In its intention, I am well convinced that it is kind, humane, and meant for reformation; but I am persuaded that those who devised this system of Prison Discipline, and those benevolent gentlemen who carry it into execution, do not know what it is that they are doing. I believe that very few men are capable of estimating the immense amount of torture and agony which this dreadful punishment, prolonged for years, inflicts upon the sufferers; and in guessing at it myself, and in reasoning from what I have seen written upon their faces, and what to my certain knowledge they feel within, I am only the more convinced that there is a depth of terrible endurance in it which none but the sufferers themselves can fathom, and which no man has a right to inflict upon his fellow-creature. I hold this slow and daily tampering with the mysteries of the brain, to be immeasurably worse than any torture of the body: and because its ghastly signs and tokens are not so palpable to the eye and sense of touch as scars upon the flesh; because its wounds are not upon the surface, and it extorts few cries that human ears can hear; therefore I the more denounce it, as a secret punishment which slumbering humanity is not roused up to stay. I hesitated once, debating with myself, whether, if I had the power of saying ‘Yes’ or ‘No,’ I would allow it to be tried in certain cases, where the terms of imprisonment were short; but now, I solemnly declare, that with no rewards or honours could I walk a happy man beneath the open sky by day, or lie me down upon my bed at night, with the consciousness that one human creature, for any length of time, no matter what, lay suffering this unknown punishment in his silent cell, and I the cause, or I consenting to it in the least degree.
Source: Charles Dickens, American Notes (1842). Public domain.
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How this is marked

AO2 (published assessment objective): Explain, comment on and analyse how writers use language and structure to achieve effects and influence readers, using relevant subject terminology to support their views (English). For Geography: demonstrate geographical understanding of concepts and how they are used in relation to places, environments and processes, and the interrelationships between places, environments and processes. For History: explain and analyse historical events and periods studied using second-order historical concepts.

Assessed against AO2 using Revision Robin's own level descriptors below. These are not the exam board's mark scheme. Every quotation in the feedback is checked against your answer and the extract before you see it, and a teacher's mark overrides ours.

Level 4 · 12 to 15Perceptive, detailed analysis. Explains precisely how specific word choices, techniques or structural features shape the reader's response; quotations are apt and well chosen; terminology is accurate and sharpens the point rather than decorating it.
Level 3 · 9 to 11Clear, relevant explanation of effects. Quotations are relevant and mostly well chosen; terminology is accurate; the answer explains effect rather than only naming features.
Level 2 · 5 to 8Some understanding of effects. Attempts to comment on effect, often in general terms; some relevant quotation; terminology sometimes used, sometimes inaccurately.
Level 1 · 1 to 4Simple awareness. Mostly paraphrase or retelling; little or no quotation; features named without explanation of effect.